.:HSTuners::::Hondas Wanted:: |
05-15-2003, 01:22 PM
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#1 |
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Repost Wagon
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: over here
Age: 44
Posts: 17,266
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some more laughs
What's the best form of birth control after 50?
Nudity ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 lbs. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 minutes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's the fastest way to a man's heart? Through his chest with a sharp knife. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking? Because those men already have boyfriends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why does the bride always wear white? Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How do you know when you're really ugly? Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How do you know when you're leading a pathetic life? When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Lets just be friends." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why did God create alcohol? So ugly people could have sex, too. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? "Are you sure it's mine?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? A speech impediment. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don't have eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What's the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale? A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time." A Southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."
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05-15-2003, 01:55 PM
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#2 |
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ROFLMFAO!!!
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05-15-2003, 02:11 PM
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Project Combat Honda
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Highland,OH
Age: 46
Posts: 7,985
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Damn.. I had to knock the dust off of some of those jokes to read them.:o
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Racing Rice |
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05-15-2003, 02:22 PM
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Quote:
Nice  |
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05-15-2003, 02:42 PM
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Winnipeg, MB
Age: 41
Posts: 3,821
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LOL......
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05-15-2003, 02:43 PM
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#6 |
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What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment. That's too funny. I never heard that one. |
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05-15-2003, 02:45 PM
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#7 |
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Really? Never. I've definitely heard it a ton.
To quote Homer Jay Simpson: "It's funny because it's true" |
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05-15-2003, 02:58 PM
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#8 |
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Insomniac Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: OR
Age: 44
Posts: 11,142
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LMAO those are oldies but goodies
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1994 Accord EX coupe --Need hosting for your pics on HST? PM me...-- |
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05-15-2003, 03:31 PM
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#9 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Santa Barbara, California
Age: 39
Posts: 5,446
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LOL those are great
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05-15-2003, 04:38 PM
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Quote:
Ok Ive never heard this..someone help me out...?????? Kelly~ |
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05-16-2003, 01:09 AM
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Quote:
how do you give a redneck a circumcision?? kick his sister in the jaw |
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05-16-2003, 05:55 AM
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Quote:
...now that's messed up. |
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05-16-2003, 09:50 AM
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Quote:
Italians talk a lot with their hands. |
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05-25-2003, 10:29 PM
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#14 |
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Good stuff.
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