.:HSTuners::::Hondas Wanted:: |
10-17-2002, 06:21 PM
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#1 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: York
Age: 44
Posts: 2,542
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Question for the guys
Ok...I have a couple different guy friends that smoke, do drugs, or drink a lot (or any combo of the 3) and by having some converstations with some of them, they have told me that they'd give up their "nasty habits" for a girlfriend. Would any of you do the same? I'm just curious since I know like 3 or 4 guys that would....I didn't know if it would be a universal trend or not.
I can't say that I'd change anything about myself for a guy unless I wanted to previously change that particular quality. My rule is that if I'm with someone, then I'm with them for a reason and it's not to change them. Sure I might not like some of the things he does, but I'm not gonna make it my life goal to change him or make him stop something that he likes doing (unless of course it puts me in danger). I figure why should I be with someone if I'm gonna try to change them into someone they aren't. I should just try to find exactly what I'm looking for and deal with being single. Am I way off base on this?
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"Oh, I have a goal. And it's to have no goals at all." http://www.myspace.com/kenike |
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10-17-2002, 06:28 PM
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#2 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Calgary, AB Canada
Age: 40
Posts: 2,962
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No...i think you're on the bullseye baby..I mean i completely understand what you're saying and i agree with it. But i wouldn't mind if i had an annoying habit or something and my gf pointed it out to me politely but if it's something unique or original about my personality and its not hurting anyone..she can't change me
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10-17-2002, 06:35 PM
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#3 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: York
Age: 44
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but if it was a habit that she didn't like, would you stop doing it because she didn't like it? Like I can understand if it were a habit you wanted to kick anyway, using her as an "excuse" or catalyst to stop a habit, but if it was something that you were content with doing and didn't see it as a "nasty" habit would you kick it just cuz she didn't like it?
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"Oh, I have a goal. And it's to have no goals at all." http://www.myspace.com/kenike |
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10-17-2002, 07:11 PM
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#4 |
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Yahoo Watashi wa kattaze!
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Meanwhile, up in The D...
Age: 42
Posts: 10,579
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I dont do any of those things but I would if I did. Then again the girl would have to want me to stop doing those things. I know Ihave some other bad habits that I would stop for a girl; spending so much time with my car.
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10-17-2002, 11:56 PM
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#5 | ||
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Stefan's A Sheep Fucker
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: N.C.
Age: 50
Posts: 3,748
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I would absolutely not change anything about myself for a female...been there, done that, got kicked in the coconuts for it. If I'm gonna change something about myself, it will be for me...not anyone else.
But, I agree with Accord17, if I'm with someone and they pointed out that I had a bad habit and politely asked me if I would stop it...I would consider it...especially if it was you D  
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10-18-2002, 07:04 AM
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#6 |
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Repost Wagon
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: over here
Age: 44
Posts: 17,266
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that's tuff. i smoke, and i smoke a lot. sometimes i even smell like an ashtray at times
, but i won't change anything about me for a gf. she is gotta accept me for what i am, and not attempt to change me. Maybe by getting a gf will make me quit smoking, when i calm down, because right now i'm just a big pack of nerves.
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10-18-2002, 07:36 AM
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#7 |
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Posts: n/a
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The problem with this thing is your still changing for a woman. No one should have to change, otherwise you dont really want to be seeing the person you first meet you want them to be someone else.
There is also another problem, so you change once for your gf and she loves you for it and for years she's just a bouncy blonde. Then something else comes up, she knows she's changed you in the past so know being the clever girl she is she tries to do it this time as well. This time though she isn't so open about it and she tries more sutle way of doing it, the sex drops off, she doesn't like your friends around the house anymore and generally she bitches to you about stuff you've been doing for years. Once the dooors open, the doors open. So no i would never change for a girl and if your thinking what i think your thinking about I wouldn't enter a relationship with someone when they just stopped doing something they used to love. They will hold it against you and theres a saying, you can take the man out of Toronot but you can never take the Toronto out of the man. Get the idea? |
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10-18-2002, 07:53 AM
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#8 |
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Project Combat Honda
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Highland,OH
Age: 46
Posts: 7,985
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The only reason anyone would give up anything is because they want to. They may use a woman as an excuse. If they arent serious about stopping other then the woman, chances are they wouldnt stop, or if they did it wouldnt be for long.
I never picked up any bad habits like those so I dont have to worry about it. My dad on the other hand did give up smoking when my mom said its was either smoking or her (before they got married.) But technically he switched from cigarettes to cigars and pipes. But eventually he quit smoking everything. 
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Racing Rice |
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10-18-2002, 12:34 PM
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#9 |
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Posts: n/a
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I would have to say that you shouldnt change cause she wants you to but that you want to. I went threw this with my wife when we first met and I was a local cartel man if you catch my drift ...If not I used to love to hit the slopes. I was a well known member of the drug society. My wife wanted me to quit but I had to quit for myself not for her. She understood that it was a problem not only the money but the drugs them selves. She finally left me untill I changed my mine and wanted to quit. Once I decided that then she was willing to help me .......I gess what im getting at is that people will always love you no matter what the case .....When it comes to drugs and drinking if you have a problem dont use a woman as an exscuse to quit do it for your self so that maybe you can find a nice woman. I still to this day have freinds that say the same thing ...That if they had a woman they would quit....What they dont realize is that if they cleaned up then woman might wanna hook up with them ....How I got my wife is beyond me cause I was really F up....Maybe she just seen the real person beneath all the drugs....Like i said if you have a problem make the change for your self if not that then do it for your famillys sake ......Trust me its not a fun thing to see all your buddys layin in an early grave....
Hope this may help some one out there .... Ty13 Lucky13 |
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10-18-2002, 01:46 PM
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#10 |
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Posts: n/a
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If you're willing enough to change your ways simply because of a girlfriend, why are your ways like that in the first place? People shouldn't be doing things that they'd simply change for a g/f or b/f.
I'm me, take me as I am or leave me be. b |
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10-18-2002, 03:19 PM
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#11 |
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I gess I never planned on meeting my wife thats why I did the things I did ....Also I didnt thing I was gonna make it to 21 so I gess I didnt care what happened to me ....That is until I met the woman of my dreams....
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10-18-2002, 03:54 PM
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#12 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: York
Age: 44
Posts: 2,542
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I truely am impressed. I thought I was the one off base on this. Thanks gentlemen!
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"Oh, I have a goal. And it's to have no goals at all." http://www.myspace.com/kenike |
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10-19-2002, 08:17 PM
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#13 | ||
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4th Gear
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: York, Pa
Age: 45
Posts: 952
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Quote:
Awww, I think someone has the hots for Denise! Quote:
Couldn't of said it better myself! I don't mind the drinking, as long as he is responsible about it. I'm not crazy about guys who smoke or do drugs, but I would never ask for him to quit. All I would do is let him know that I'm not really down with it and ask that he not do them around me. I'd hope that isn't asking to much?
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave -- but there's no need to be in the passing lane. -- Robert Orben |
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10-19-2002, 09:36 PM
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#14 | |||
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Stefan's A Sheep Fucker
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: N.C.
Age: 50
Posts: 3,748
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Quote:
And who might that be 
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Rob Quote:
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HondaStyle.com Babysitter's Club Member #7 Anna Fan Club Member #1 |
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10-20-2002, 11:00 AM
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#15 | |
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4th Gear
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: York, Pa
Age: 45
Posts: 952
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Quote:
Ah, gee, I don't know..... 
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave -- but there's no need to be in the passing lane. -- Robert Orben |
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10-20-2002, 01:29 PM
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#16 | |
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Posts: n/a
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i think its rob.... |
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10-20-2002, 06:28 PM
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#17 | ||||
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Stefan's A Sheep Fucker
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: N.C.
Age: 50
Posts: 3,748
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Quote:
 btw, I like your new avatar, wish I could see pics to see if you truely have a ghetto booty though Quote:
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Rob Quote:
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HondaStyle.com Babysitter's Club Member #7 Anna Fan Club Member #1 |
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10-21-2002, 03:31 AM
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#18 | |
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Best...mod...ever
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: At the end of the longest line
Age: 43
Posts: 7,451
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Re: Question for the guys
Quote:
I'd say half yes and half no. I smoke about a pack a day, don't do drugs, but I drink too damn much. As far as smoking goes...no way. It keeps me sane and if a girl doesn't like it she'll have to at least accept it. As far as drinking I think I would stop but not solely because of the girl. People who drink too much do it to cover something up...same reason people do drugs (I've been there and done that too). I think if I were in a healthy (underline HEALTHY ) relationship I would lose a good deal of interest in alcohol since I'd have something positive to focus on. But anyone who'd give up their habits just for the purpose of a girlfriend are sheep. They don't know what they want and are just looking for someone to guide them. Just my $.02.
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1984 1/2 Mustang GT350 #842, Faster than you...nuff said Anna Fan Club President/Dictator Someday, in the event that mankind actually figures out what it is that this world actually revoles around, thousands of people are going to be shocked and perplexed that it was not them. Sometimes this includes me. "If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever." - George Orwell Welcome to the new Amerika |
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10-21-2002, 10:31 AM
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#19 |
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Thought Police
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: orlando florida
Age: 41
Posts: 9,662
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^ i like that response, drinking is something to do, it is fun, but if i had a girl who didnt drink and we had alot of fun together, i could jsut not do it and be happy. i wouldnt "quit" but ust have no urge to.
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Black Vtec Prelude-h22a power'd  Many dreams come true, and some have silver linings. I live for my dreams and a pocket full of gold. |
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11-06-2002, 08:46 PM
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#20 | |
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Posts: n/a
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Re: Question for the guys
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If I went looking for some to fit the exact qualifications that I want....I would be alone for the rest of my LIFE!! haha I think I'd probly try to change someone... I'd look for most of the things that I liked and then if there was only 1 or 2 things I didn't like, I figure, I could mold that and work out the kinks. Or maybe I'm just evil. |
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11-06-2002, 08:52 PM
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#21 | |
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Re: Re: Question for the guys
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you are evil! |
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11-06-2002, 09:17 PM
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#22 |
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elyK
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: New Braunfels, TX
Age: 39
Posts: 3,390
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I'd quit doing something for someone else...
If i really cared about the person, and wanted to be with them...I'd probably change... But if someone comes up to me and is like, "If you don't quit smoking, i'm not gonna talk to you ever again." Then i say **** them...
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IGNORE THE FACTS EXPLORE THE TRUTH |
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11-06-2002, 10:20 PM
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#23 | |
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 1,584
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Quote:
Alright, if you have to change the type of person you are, no mattter what you are, just to meet someone decent and maybe score down the road, then you're just putting on a front and that's lame. If someone is going to like you, they should like you for who you are, and vice versa. If you want to stop drinking/smoking/doingdrugs, just to better yourself, then that's a whole nother story. Go for it.
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11-07-2002, 08:42 AM
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#24 |
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Posts: n/a
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I use to change for a guy if he wanted me to, but that was back in the days when I didn't know who I was.....and was scared to be alone. I use to do it to my boyfriends too.....try to change things...
My x use to smoke alot of weed....I mean ALOT...I didn't like it and I always nagged at him for it....but he told me that he would never stop and that if it came down to it he would leave me. That made me think....then I really took a look at myself....I knew that he was like that when I met him, so eventually I let it go. If smoking, drinking, or whatever makes someone happy, why would anyone want to take that away from a person and try to change them?? Unless it is comming to a point where it is harming them or yourself...right? So, all in all....I will never ever try to change anyone ever again, and I'd never change myself for a man either (unless within reason) If you don't like something about a person in the first place, why would you get in a relationship with them only to try and change them? |
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11-07-2002, 10:51 AM
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#25 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Winnipeg, MB
Age: 41
Posts: 3,821
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i just drink....and i wouldnt change that for a girlfreind...if she didnt like me drinking..(mostly at parties,weekend) then bye bye..the only case i know of someone changing there habits...is my cousin...and it wasnt for a girl either..lol he quit smoking so he could take Jiu Jitsu......
plus my aunt gave em 400 bucks......and me 100 cause i was in the same room lmao |
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