.:HSTuners::

06-18-2002, 03:51 PM

I thought A LOT of them were funny AND true.

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules
from the male side. These are their rules! Please note...these are all
numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
you leaving it down.

1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can
find the perfect present yet again!

1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than
short
hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married
women
always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that
way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not
work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on the
calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd
be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with
your
dress?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Check your oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In
fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to
answer.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months
we
were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for
example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea
what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading
ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's
wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss
such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.
No, it doesn't matter which quiz.

1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping.

1. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape

06-18-2002, 05:04 PM

Quote:

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what

Quote:

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it

Quote:

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.

Quote:

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like

i think these are the most important some work both ways though

DsBlu01CivEX · 06-18-2002, 06:38 PM

ugh...you boys! I've seen that one multiple times....

OH...and I don't have enough clothing and I surely don't have too many shoes!!!! (yah I have over 100 prs of shoes)

06-18-2002, 06:49 PM

all boys do is complain..if we r too much of a hassle or ya'll go gay.. u would be better off

06-18-2002, 06:57 PM

oh know i like girls the way they are, and only girls!

nah your not to much trouble just some of the things you girls do is just funny and often really cute

*ChrisCantSkate* · 06-18-2002, 07:29 PM

haha, seen it, but still good

06-18-2002, 08:03 PM

Quote:

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
nothing's
wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

best of all.

and yes seen just about all of them before.

oh... and why are they all 1.?

06-18-2002, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Maxvla

best of all.

and yes seen just about all of them before.

oh... and why are they all 1.?

Please note...these are all
numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

06-18-2002, 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juvenile

Please note...these are all
numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

i get it now...

06-18-2002, 09:00 PM

since it before but still funny to me

and I still dont get what the #1 is for sorry i'm a little slow

06-18-2002, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by heartbreakkid
since it before but still funny to me and I still dont get what the #1 is for sorry i'm a little slow

Because each of the rules is as important as the rest. They are all important

Wren57 · 06-18-2002, 10:15 PM

This was posted like 3 months ago, but still funny

94_AcCoRd_EX · 06-18-2002, 10:48 PM

Hehe, I like #1 the best.

06-19-2002, 12:15 AM

i have to show my girl this

Whiteclipse99 · 06-19-2002, 12:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by juvenile

1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than
short
hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married
women
always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

I happen to like my hair short, so you guys just have to deal with it!

Kyle · 06-19-2002, 12:24 PM

very nice
i've seen them before...but still

06-19-2002, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Whiteclipse99

I happen to like my hair short, so you guys just have to deal with it!

i like girls with short hair

not quite a as short as a guy's cut length. longest i really like is shoulder length and thats pushing it.

Violent Apathy · 06-19-2002, 08:54 PM

Quote:

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like

best one by far

DsBlu01CivEX · 06-20-2002, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Whiteclipse99

I happen to like my hair short, so you guys just have to deal with it!

I like my short hair too. If I let my hair get longer than sholder lenght it looks like hell. Curls don't look as nice etc etc. So yes...you boys will have to deal with my short hair as well.

06-20-2002, 02:27 PM

my bf happens to like my hair short (ha! atleast i hope so!)... anyways, i can't have long hair cause it's so thick, my dr. told me that's why i had so many headaches was because my hair was so heavy. so, now i always have it short...much better

06-20-2002, 02:42 PM

oh, and i'd just like to add that a lot of those go the other way around too! the whole saying 'nothing's wrong' my bf does that all that time and it drives me nuts. i DO check my oil, and i only have a couple pair of shoes, and i could care less which one matches my dress

lots of those are stereotypes of girls, granted, i know it's all a joke, and they were funny, but a lot of them aren't true...

06-18-2002, 06:38 PM	#3
DsBlu01CivEX Registered User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: York Age: 44 Posts: 2,542	ugh...you boys! I've seen that one multiple times.... OH...and I don't have enough clothing and I surely don't have too many shoes!!!! (yah I have over 100 prs of shoes) __________________ "Oh, I have a goal. And it's to have no goals at all." http://www.myspace.com/kenike

06-18-2002, 07:29 PM	#6
ChrisCantSkate Thought Police Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: orlando florida Age: 41 Posts: 9,662	haha, seen it, but still good __________________ Black Vtec Prelude-h22a power'd Many dreams come true, and some have silver linings. I live for my dreams and a pocket full of gold.

06-18-2002, 10:15 PM	#12
Wren57 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2002 Age: 40 Posts: 2,856	This was posted like 3 months ago, but still funny __________________ yeah, its that big

06-18-2002, 10:48 PM	#13
94_AcCoRd_EX Insomniac Moderator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: OR Age: 44 Posts: 11,142	Hehe, I like #1 the best. __________________ 1994 Accord EX coupe --Need hosting for your pics on HST? PM me...--

06-19-2002, 12:24 PM	#16
Kyle elyK Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: New Braunfels, TX Age: 38 Posts: 3,390	very nice i've seen them before...but still __________________ IGNORE THE FACTS EXPLORE THE TRUTH

06-18-2002, 03:51 PM	#1
juvenile Posts: n/a	The Male Rules I thought A LOT of them were funny AND true. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are their rules! Please note...these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again! 1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it. 1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on the calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand. 1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress? 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 1. Check your oil! Please. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we. 1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz. 1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you. 1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that, it's like camping. 1. I am in shape. ROUND is a shape

06-18-2002, 06:49 PM	#4
xhondagirl Posts: n/a	all boys do is complain..if we r too much of a hassle or ya'll go gay.. u would be better off

06-18-2002, 06:57 PM	#5
mt.biker Posts: n/a	oh know i like girls the way they are, and only girls! nah your not to much trouble just some of the things you girls do is just funny and often really cute

06-18-2002, 09:00 PM	#10
heartbreakkid Posts: n/a	since it before but still funny to me and I still dont get what the #1 is for sorry i'm a little slow

06-19-2002, 12:15 AM	#14
bootstrap Posts: n/a	i have to show my girl this

06-20-2002, 02:27 PM	#20
Honda_Gurl Posts: n/a	my bf happens to like my hair short (ha! atleast i hope so!)... anyways, i can't have long hair cause it's so thick, my dr. told me that's why i had so many headaches was because my hair was so heavy. so, now i always have it short...much better

06-20-2002, 02:42 PM	#21
Honda_Gurl Posts: n/a	oh, and i'd just like to add that a lot of those go the other way around too! the whole saying 'nothing's wrong' my bf does that all that time and it drives me nuts. i DO check my oil, and i only have a couple pair of shoes, and i could care less which one matches my dress lots of those are stereotypes of girls, granted, i know it's all a joke, and they were funny, but a lot of them aren't true...

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