.:HSTuners::

thermal · 01-10-2002, 05:07 PM

one of my boss sent this to me via e-mail:

Thought y'all might get a kick out of this:

The next time you have a bad day at work....think
of this guy. He is a commercial saturation diver for ***** in
*******. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent his sister. She then sent it to Laughline, who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won. Here's how it went:
=========================================
Hi *&%, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000.00 piece of shit sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is I take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started to itch. So, ofcourse, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony, I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my wet suit. Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my ass. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my ass as soon as I get in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't shit for 2 days because my asshole was swollen shut. So, the next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass.

:P :P :P :P :P

SilverHX4Me · 01-10-2002, 05:09 PM

aaaaaaahahahaa poor guy

ebpda9 · 01-10-2002, 05:13 PM

Geez that was funny. i feel sorry for the poor guy.

01-10-2002, 05:32 PM

Jellyfish up the a**.......

haha, poor guy

Accord Man · 01-10-2002, 07:47 PM

LMAO

IF thats true story.. Man poor guy!!

*ChrisCantSkate* · 01-10-2002, 09:53 PM

double post.......

*ChrisCantSkate* · 01-10-2002, 09:54 PM

LOFL that was great...... but man poor guy, at least it didnt make it around the corner

01-10-2002, 10:05 PM

well it could have been worse!!! he could have been trying to keep his jimmy warm now that woulda sucked!!!!!!

*Whtehnda93DXSdn* · 01-10-2002, 10:14 PM

that was great....Ohhh *** I needed that laugh.

thanks for sharing...

thermal · 01-12-2002, 09:33 AM

yeah....it's supposed to be a true story.....

94_AcCoRd_EX · 01-12-2002, 12:55 PM

LOL, good story

01-10-2002, 05:07 PM	#1
thermal Banning Machine Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: My Garage, Va. Posts: 5,547	ya think u had a bad day at work?! a funny story! one of my boss sent this to me via e-mail: Thought y'all might get a kick out of this: The next time you have a bad day at work....think of this guy. He is a commercial saturation diver for *** in ****. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent his sister. She then sent it to Laughline, who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won. Here's how it went: ========================================= Hi &%, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000.00 piece of shit sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is I take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started to itch. So, ofcourse, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony, I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my wet suit. Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my ass. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my ass as soon as I get in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't shit for 2 days because my asshole was swollen shut. So, the next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass. :P :P :P :P :P __________________ Project Teg Visit the Turbo Forum

01-10-2002, 05:13 PM	#3
ebpda9 Repost Wagon Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: over here Age: 44 Posts: 17,266	Geez that was funny. i feel sorry for the poor guy. __________________

01-10-2002, 07:47 PM	#5
Accord Man THE GENERAL Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Earth (usually) Age: 43 Posts: 5,698	LMAO IF thats true story.. Man poor guy!! __________________ HondaStyle.com Babysitter's Club Member #0 Soon to be >Dr Max Immuh<

01-10-2002, 09:53 PM	#6
ChrisCantSkate Thought Police Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: orlando florida Age: 41 Posts: 9,662	double post....... __________________ Black Vtec Prelude-h22a power'd Many dreams come true, and some have silver linings. I live for my dreams and a pocket full of gold. Last edited by ChrisCantSkate : 01-10-2002 at 10:18 PM.

01-10-2002, 09:54 PM	#7
ChrisCantSkate Thought Police Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: orlando florida Age: 41 Posts: 9,662	LOFL that was great...... but man poor guy, at least it didnt make it around the corner __________________ Black Vtec Prelude-h22a power'd Many dreams come true, and some have silver linings. I live for my dreams and a pocket full of gold.

01-10-2002, 05:09 PM	#2
SilverHX4Me 2nd Gear Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: somewhere Age: 46 Posts: 291	aaaaaaahahahaa poor guy

01-10-2002, 05:32 PM	#4
TruHeel142 Posts: n/a	Jellyfish up the a**....... haha, poor guy

01-10-2002, 10:05 PM	#8
tightteg52 Posts: n/a	well it could have been worse!!! he could have been trying to keep his jimmy warm now that woulda sucked!!!!!!

01-10-2002, 10:14 PM	#9
Whtehnda93DXSdn It has 4 Doors... Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Fredericksburg,Va Age: 50 Posts: 907	that was great....Ohhh *** I needed that laugh. thanks for sharing... __________________ Another good forum site: Tuners Alliance

01-12-2002, 09:33 AM	#10
thermal Banning Machine Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: My Garage, Va. Posts: 5,547	yeah....it's supposed to be a true story..... __________________ Project Teg Visit the Turbo Forum

01-12-2002, 12:55 PM	#11
94_AcCoRd_EX Insomniac Moderator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: OR Age: 44 Posts: 11,142	LOL, good story __________________ 1994 Accord EX coupe --Need hosting for your pics on HST? PM me...--

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