.:HSTuners::

*ChrisCantSkate* · 06-09-2005, 08:18 AM

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaking tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the best time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. No one is listening until you fart.

6. Always remember you're unique Just like everyone else.

7. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

8. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

9. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

10. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

11. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

12. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

13. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

14. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield.

15. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

16. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

17. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

18. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

19. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21. There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

22. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.

23. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday ... around age 11.

24. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

There are four stages of man.
when he believes in Santa Claus
when he does not believe in Santa Claus
when he is Santa Claus
when he looks like Santa Claus

AkimboStylee · 06-09-2005, 01:30 PM

those are great

*KwikR6* · 06-09-2005, 03:05 PM

hahahah i like those!!!

*AzCivic* · 06-09-2005, 09:59 PM

aaaahahahhaahah!!!!

CD5Passion · 06-10-2005, 01:08 AM

my favorite is the ducttape one lol nice work chris

mylittlecivic · 06-10-2005, 01:45 AM

ive seen those before, realy funny. has anyone ever read aesops fables?

ebpda9 · 06-10-2005, 10:59 PM

i've seen some of those before

thermal · 06-11-2005, 04:55 PM

good shit!

drdingo21 · 06-12-2005, 12:40 AM

I chuckled.

GT40FIED · 06-12-2005, 12:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by drdingo21
I chuckled.

Indeed. I laughed 'till I stopped.

*KwikR6* · 06-12-2005, 05:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by GT40FIED
Indeed. I laughed 'till I stopped.

Go figure..you lauged till you stopped...isn't that obvious...bwahahahahahaha jk homie!!! hahah

MissJDM · 06-13-2005, 02:46 AM

For once, I've actually read that before!!

19. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

Smart.

*KwikR6* · 06-13-2005, 09:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by MissJDM
For once, I've actually read that before!!

19. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

Smart.

I have my own theories about women...and arguing with them...haha

GT40FIED · 06-13-2005, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KwikR6
I have my own theories about women...and arguing with them...haha

Does it include the phrase "5 across the eyes" at any part?

*KwikR6* · 06-13-2005, 12:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GT40FIED
Does it include the phrase "5 across the eyes" at any part?

Fuck yeah it does....

Racing Rice · 06-13-2005, 12:11 PM

Those are so damn true.

GT40FIED · 06-13-2005, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by KwikR6
Fuck yeah it does....

Awesome.

I assume that's followed up with "look what you made me do to you!"?

*KwikR6* · 06-14-2005, 11:01 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by GT40FIED
Awesome.

I assume that's followed up with "look what you made me do to you!"?

And then no apology.

Wren57 · 06-14-2005, 11:13 AM

Charlie Murphy bitch!

CD5Passion · 06-14-2005, 12:01 PM

lol I'm wayne brady bish

ewaugh · 06-14-2005, 11:12 PM

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice

06-09-2005, 08:18 AM	#1
ChrisCantSkate Thought Police Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: orlando florida Age: 40 Posts: 9,662	some zen thoughts 1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone. 2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaking tire. 3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the best time to do it. 4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted. 5. No one is listening until you fart. 6. Always remember you're unique Just like everyone else. 7. Never test the depth of the water with both feet. 8. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments. 9. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes. 10. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 11. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. 12. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it. 13. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. 14. Some days you are the bug; some days you are the windshield. 15. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. 16. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket. 17. A closed mouth gathers no foot. 18. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together. 19. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works. 20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. 21. There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness." 22. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously. 23. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday ... around age 11. 24. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. There are four stages of man. when he believes in Santa Claus when he does not believe in Santa Claus when he is Santa Claus when he looks like Santa Claus __________________ Black Vtec Prelude-h22a power'd Many dreams come true, and some have silver linings. I live for my dreams and a pocket full of gold.

06-09-2005, 01:30 PM	#2
AkimboStylee Registered User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: The Bay which holds no water, Palm Bay, Fl Age: 38 Posts: 1,688	those are great __________________ A very good quote : " I have many vices in my life, and those keep me from perfection, and not being perfect makes me a human being with morals" -Anonymous

06-09-2005, 03:05 PM	#3
KwikR6 Mind Blowing Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Cloud 69 Age: 44 Posts: 8,871	hahahah i like those!!! __________________ I JDM. I My Honda The epitome of stupidity is expressed so fluidly with the shity lyric theory you try to spit at me. I CAN'T WAIT FOR SUMMER!!!

06-10-2005, 01:08 AM	#5
CD5Passion Registered User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Santa Barbara, California Age: 38 Posts: 5,446	my favorite is the ducttape one lol nice work chris __________________

06-10-2005, 10:59 PM	#7
ebpda9 Repost Wagon Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: over here Age: 43 Posts: 17,266	i've seen some of those before __________________

06-09-2005, 09:59 PM	#4
AzCivic Moderator Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Az Age: 43 Posts: 3,804	aaaahahahhaahah!!!!

06-11-2005, 04:55 PM	#8
thermal Banning Machine Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: My Garage, Va. Posts: 5,547	good shit! __________________ Project Teg Visit the Turbo Forum

06-12-2005, 12:40 AM	#9
drdingo21 Registered User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Elkhart, IN Age: 41 Posts: 1,642	I chuckled.

06-13-2005, 02:46 AM	#12
MissJDM Registered User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: West Coast Age: 37 Posts: 2,244	For once, I've actually read that before!! 19. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works. Smart. __________________ you say it best when you say nothing at all

06-13-2005, 12:11 PM	#16
Racing Rice Project Combat Honda Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Highland,OH Age: 45 Posts: 7,985	Those are so damn true. __________________ Racing Rice

06-14-2005, 11:13 AM	#19
Wren57 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2002 Age: 39 Posts: 2,856	Charlie Murphy bitch! __________________ yeah, its that big

06-14-2005, 12:01 PM	#20
CD5Passion Registered User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Santa Barbara, California Age: 38 Posts: 5,446	lol I'm wayne brady bish __________________

06-14-2005, 11:12 PM	#21
ewaugh Registered User Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: AL Posts: 86	What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice __________________ "Drive Carefully: 90% of all people are caused by accidents"

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