.:HSTuners::

Whiteclipse99 · 02-03-2003, 12:48 PM

Gee, really makes me look forward to getting older.....

An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tightly so that it would not blow off in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?" "Yes, I know," said the lady, "I need both hands to hold onto this hat." "But, madam, you must know that your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest. The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"

Ethel and Mabel, two elderly widows, were watching the folks go by from their park bench. Ethel said, "You know, Mabel, I've been reading this 'Sex and Marriage'book and all they talk about is 'mutual orgasm'. 'Mutual orgasm' here and mutual orgasm' there - that's all they talk about. Tell me, Mabel, when your husband was alive, did you two ever have mutual orgasm?".
Mabel thought for a long while. Finally, she shook her head and said, "No, I think we had State Farm.

Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home Reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger
and cheaper also, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece. The third old lady remarked, "I can't hear a word you're saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about."

94_AcCoRd_EX · 02-03-2003, 01:07 PM

LMAO! The second one's great

ebpda9 · 02-03-2003, 01:20 PM

LMAO, i liked the third one the best

02-03-2003, 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Whiteclipse99
Gee, really makes me look forward to getting older.....
Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home Reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger
and cheaper also, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece. The third old lady remarked, "I can't hear a word you're saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about."

good laughs...

a96710 · 02-03-2003, 02:15 PM

LOL....good stuff

02-03-2003, 02:44 PM

to the first one

to the rest

the third one was the best

02-03-2003, 03:19 PM

Those were cute! I get tears in my eyes when I think about getting old...I get so depressed!

Kelly~

02-03-2003, 05:19 PM

You are old right? 300lbs and 40 years old

Rob · 02-03-2003, 08:05 PM

LMAO to the 2nd & 3rd one.......

02-04-2003, 10:04 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AccordinStyle
LMAO to the 2nd & 3rd one.......

02-04-2003, 04:40 PM

what the.. sorry for the pic. I dont recall putting that up, or why.

DsBlu01CivEX · 02-04-2003, 10:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by hondaman-iac
LMAO, i liked the third one the best

agreed!

02-09-2003, 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by TerKel00
Those were cute! I get tears in my eyes when I think about getting old...I get so depressed!

Me too Kelly! It was SO hard when I turned 20, everyone was excited but me, I felt SO old! I remember when I was younger looking at 20 yr. olds & thinking, they're SO grown up!

Now I'm going to be 22 in 2 months!!!!

Rob · 02-09-2003, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GirlRacer
Me too Kelly! It was SO hard when I turned 20, everyone was excited but me, I felt SO old! I remember when I was younger looking at 20 yr. olds & thinking, they're SO grown up!

Now I'm going to be 22 in 2 months!!!!

02-09-2003, 06:22 PM

lol...2nd one was good...lol

02-03-2003, 12:48 PM	#1
Whiteclipse99 4th Gear Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: York, Pa Age: 44 Posts: 952	Something to look forward to ladies.... Gee, really makes me look forward to getting older..... An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tightly so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?" "Yes, I know," said the lady, "I need both hands to hold onto this hat." "But, madam, you must know that your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest. The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!" Ethel and Mabel, two elderly widows, were watching the folks go by from their park bench. Ethel said, "You know, Mabel, I've been reading this 'Sex and Marriage'book and all they talk about is 'mutual orgasm'. 'Mutual orgasm' here and mutual orgasm' there - that's all they talk about. Tell me, Mabel, when your husband was alive, did you two ever have mutual orgasm?". Mabel thought for a long while. Finally, she shook her head and said, "No, I think we had State Farm. Three old ladies were sitting side by side in their retirement home Reminiscing. The first lady recalled shopping at the green grocers and demonstrated with her hands, the length and thickness of a cucumber she could buy for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions used to be much bigger and cheaper also, and demonstrated the size of two big onions she could buy for a penny a piece. The third old lady remarked, "I can't hear a word you're saying, but I remember the guy you're talking about." __________________ Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave -- but there's no need to be in the passing lane. -- Robert Orben

02-03-2003, 01:07 PM	#2
94_AcCoRd_EX Insomniac Moderator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: OR Age: 43 Posts: 11,142	LMAO! The second one's great __________________ 1994 Accord EX coupe --Need hosting for your pics on HST? PM me...--

02-03-2003, 01:20 PM	#3
ebpda9 Repost Wagon Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: over here Age: 44 Posts: 17,266	LMAO, i liked the third one the best __________________

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02-03-2003, 02:15 PM	#5
a96710 Registered User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Vancouver, Wa Age: 43 Posts: 1,454	LOL....good stuff

02-03-2003, 02:44 PM	#6
firstgeardude Posts: n/a	to the first one to the rest the third one was the best

02-03-2003, 03:19 PM	#7
TerKel00 Posts: n/a	Those were cute! I get tears in my eyes when I think about getting old...I get so depressed! Kelly~

02-03-2003, 05:19 PM	#8
lucky Posts: n/a	You are old right? 300lbs and 40 years old

02-04-2003, 04:40 PM	#11
lucky Posts: n/a	what the.. sorry for the pic. I dont recall putting that up, or why.

02-09-2003, 06:22 PM	#15
RU_Teg Posts: n/a	lol...2nd one was good...lol