Plan to eliminate poverty, reduce crime and balance the budget...

[Wren57]

A little social Darwinism for a pleasant Wednesday morning.

I believe there is a way to eliminate poverty, reduce crime and create a budget surplus all within the next 20-50 years. Sound too good to be true? Bare with me.

- eliminate social welfare; no more money for poor folks popping out babies (that will just grow old and pop out more babies, draining the system)

- child tax; $2,000 due upon birth for citizenship and a birth certificate (doesn't matter if you're born in a hospital or not). To be paid to the local government of which jurisdiction the baby is born into.

- use child tax money to hire more police officers to be placed WHERE THEY ARE NEEDED MOST (I'm sick of seeing cops driving down the big/safe roads everywhere... go into the ghettos you morons!)

- free government issued condoms for those below the current poverty line. for those above, buy your own damn condoms or deal with the consequences

- legalize abortion (touchy issue, don't wanna get too deep into this one)

- eliminate social security. Save your money yourself or buy a pistol and one bullet when you retire.

- school vouchers. in my hometown it cost taxpayers an average of over 13,000 a year to send one child to public school. Our public school system is the worst in the state, and the state's is one of the worst in the country. That said, my private high school was 11,000 a year and one of the top 100 in the country.

- stiffer penalties for juvenile violence. You attack anyone with a deadly weapon, minimum 2 years imprisonment. Period.

- give $2000 back to each person when they turn 18 assuming they have a clean criminal record, no kids and a HS GPA of at least 2.0.

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Not that I think any of this will ever get implemented the way I would like it to be, it is nice to dream. And yes, I know all the humanistic people are gonna cry foul, but screw em... I'm tired of seeing problematic bottom-feeders not even try to better themselves... all many of them do is live off the system. This plan would force the lower class to make a choice; sink or swim. No more governmental buoyancy.

On a lighter note;
"They won't let you have drinks back there. I like a Jack & Coke. One time, I saw a Jack & Coke and it had a lime floating in it, and I thought "That's good to know." Next time I'm on a boat and it capsizes, I will reach for a lime... I'll be water skiing without a life jacket and people will be like "What the hell?" and I'll pull out a lime. I'll pull out a lemon too, saved by the buoyancy of citrus!"
-Mitch Hedberg, RIP