words of wisdom

Originally posted by mt.biker
5. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.

8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.
16. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

18. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter is not a nice person.

25. You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.

26. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

the waiter thing is so dam true

LMAO omg...#25 if my favorite! And the waiter thing is true. IF you look at the quotes in our agenda it's one of them (it has some good ones too! )