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Old 05-10-2002, 10:49 AM   #1
Whiteclipse99
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The 3 stages after a breakup

Through experience I've found that there are 3 stages a person goes through after a breakup. It's taken me 4 years after my breakup to figure this out. Now this only applies to people where the relationship was either a mutual breakup or the from the person who was dumped(given it was a clean breakup and you're still on good terms)

Stage 1: Of course you're upset that the relationship had to end, and most likely you don't want anything to do with that person unless they want to be your boyfriend/girlfriend again. It's too painful to see them otherwise.

Stage 2: Given some time you've accepted the breakup to an extent, and if you can't have that person as a boyfriend/girlfriend, you're happy to just have them as a friend. Of course it may be a little awkward or painful at first, but you get through it.

Stage 3: So you've become friends, and you both have gotten past everything. You have learned to accept them as a friend and if they move on, then you're happy for them. You don't want anything but the best for them.

These stages may of course differ between people and one stage may last longer than another. I'm proud to say that I'm in stage 3! It took me four years, but hey, I made it! Then of course there may be an in between stage called the "bootie call" stage. You know what I'm talking about. That stage where you "hook up", even though things are supposedly through. Yeah, that one. And even if we haven't done it, we all probably wanted to! So, there you have it, the 3 stages after a breakup.
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Old 05-10-2002, 06:10 PM   #2
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Yah I don't fit that mold. I don't know what mold I fit. Cuz I'm sorta stuck in all 3 stages. As dumba$$ of it is for me to say...I'd get back together with my ex if he wanted to, but I like still havin him as a friend, and of course I'm gonna be a little jealous if he finds someone new and makes him happier than I apparently did but I'm gonna be more than happy for him if he finds that girl. So, I sorta just chill in all 3 stages. I'm a complicated and confusing girl.

Oh and I can just hear the comments from some of the people on here now (they know who they are) about me wanting to get back together with him, me like having him as a "friend", etc.
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Old 05-11-2002, 01:43 AM   #3
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whoa that is way off..

1) harass
2) haass ex
3) harass ex repeatedly
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Old 05-11-2002, 10:28 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by DsBlu01CivEX
As dumba$$ of it is for me to say...I'd get back together with my ex if he wanted to, but I like still havin him as a friend.


I'm being good, I'll keep my comments to myself. You already know how I feel about the situation.
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Old 05-11-2002, 10:58 AM   #5
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Old 05-12-2002, 04:14 PM   #6
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Well after Friday night I don't think you have to smack me around. He might (yah who am I kidding he does) need it.
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Old 05-13-2002, 11:57 AM   #7
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How many of you have had a relationship where you're together, then you're not, you're together and then you're not? I don't know how you do it!
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Old 05-14-2002, 11:42 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by DsBlu01CivEX
As dumba$$ of it is for me to say...I'd get back together with my ex if he wanted to, but I like still havin him as a friend


A certain chorus from a song comes to mind. It goes a little somethig like this......See my days are cold without you, but I'm hurtn' while I'm with you. And no my heart can't take no more, I won't keep running back to you.
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Old 05-14-2002, 11:50 AM   #9
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Hehehehehe!
I'm in a stage 2 I guess.. cuz I think we are never gonna be friends or speak to each other or even see each other ever again.
But then I am in stage 3 with the previous ex.. but I don't wanna be. He's sooo annoying and he just won't go away! It's like I either put up with him or change my name and lose most of my friends because they are his friends too. Ugggh! Relationships!
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Old 05-14-2002, 08:10 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by Whiteclipse99



A certain chorus from a song comes to mind. It goes a little somethig like this......See my days are cold without you, but I'm hurtn' while I'm with you. And no my heart can't take no more, I won't keep running back to you.

yah thats how the chorus SHOULD go...but for some dumb reason it's more like.....

Baby, I don't know why you treat me so bad
You says you love me, no one above me
And I was all you had
And though my heart is eatin' for you
I can't stop cryin'
I don't know how I allow you to treat me this way
And still I stay

See, my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin' while I'm with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
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Old 05-14-2002, 08:55 PM   #11
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Re: The 3 stages after a breakup

Quote:
Originally posted by Whiteclipse99
Then of course there may be an in between stage called the "bootie call" stage. You know what I'm talking about. That stage where you "hook up", even though things are supposedly through.

Been there, done that!!
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Old 05-16-2002, 09:27 AM   #12
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Hey, it happens
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Last edited by Whiteclipse99 : 06-10-2002 at 10:39 AM.
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Old 05-16-2002, 07:02 PM   #13
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tisk tisk my friend!!! i can't believe you even admitted to that!!!! you weren't even gonna tell me when it happened!! silly chica!
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Old 05-17-2002, 09:59 AM   #14
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When I say "hook up", it can mean two different things. A) making out or B) sex
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Last edited by Whiteclipse99 : 06-10-2002 at 10:41 AM.
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Old 05-17-2002, 01:49 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally posted by mt.biker


but now we all know, now dont we

hahahahahahahah we were just sittin here discussing exactly that!!! hahahahaha
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Old 05-17-2002, 02:34 PM   #16
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Hooking up means different things to different people.
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Last edited by Whiteclipse99 : 06-10-2002 at 10:42 AM.
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Old 05-17-2002, 09:41 PM   #17
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Messed around = things with your hands
Fooled around = things with your mouth
Hooked up = SEX!

thats the interpretation we use here..
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Old 05-18-2002, 11:28 AM   #18
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Ok, ok, you guys got me! I hope that doesn't make me a bad person.
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Last edited by Whiteclipse99 : 06-06-2002 at 11:17 AM.
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Old 05-18-2002, 11:41 AM   #19
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Nope.. you are still an awesome girl
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Old 05-18-2002, 12:14 PM   #20
DsBlu01CivEX
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Nope you're horrible...now i gotta go find myself a new best friend.....geesh you think you know a person and then she goes and has sex with her ex bf who was the love of her life and vice versa just neither one thought it was a good idea to have an extremely long distance relationship. What are people coming to these days!!!! Now erin why would we think you are a bad person?
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Old 05-21-2002, 09:43 AM   #21
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Thanks guys! Oh and D, you could always become best friends with Alison!
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Old 05-21-2002, 10:14 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by mt.biker


is alison the old lady from work?



No, she used to be friends with us back in high school, but she was sometimes mean to D and would always get mad at me for little things, like not calling her when I said I would. She used to be my best friend, from elementary school all the way till after graduation. Then we just started to drift away. Anyway, I didn't know at first the lady D was talking about from our work, but when I told her who I thought it was, I guessed it right on the first try!
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Old 05-21-2002, 02:28 PM   #23
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and there is NO way in hell I'd be best friends with Alison again....I'd rather live alone with no friends than be friends with her. She doesn't know the true meaning of being a friend with a person.
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Old 06-02-2002, 02:32 AM   #24
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yeah, i dont fit that either.
Stage 1 for me is: Wondering if there is a chance we'll get back together. I wanna be with him....no I hate him....but I wanna be with him...but I want someone better...etc..

Stage 2: There is no stage 2 yet because we usually get back together.

(Im not good at breaking up with people)
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Old 06-02-2002, 12:50 PM   #25
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oh my God you girls are funny. Its like i'm getting a inside view on girl talk, really its very scary.

Is it wrong if you've never left stage 1?

just a question, Who is mt.biker? I see quotes but I don't see where he wrote this. Is this some person you girls made up or is it some inside girlly talk code thingy and I should just look the other way?
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Old 06-02-2002, 12:54 PM   #26
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DsBlu01CivEX, Whiteclipse99 and FeelMyRide you three crack me up. Do you three know eachother? I'm guessing you are all best friends, seems where I see one of you the other two are sure to follow up with something funny Ya'll get me laughin.
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Old 06-05-2002, 10:21 AM   #27
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Well to answer your first question about who mt.biker is....he used to be a member here, who left and got his account deleted, so every post of his was deleted along with his account. Fortunately he's back! Yeah! And to answer your second question, DsBlu01CivEX (Denise) and I (Erin) are best friends and have know eachother since 6th grade and FeelMyRide (Julie), we met on here, Honda Style. We have actually met her in person once before. What can I say, we're just a funny bunch of girls!
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Old 06-05-2002, 03:37 PM   #28
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its gotta be differently for everyone...
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