[Racing Rice]

These were entries in a competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line but least romantic second line:

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face

My love, you take my breath away
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
but I only slept with you because I was p*ssed

Roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother

Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
This describes everything you are not

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes-
D*mn I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my partner, my beautiful wife
Marrying you really screwed up my life

I see your face when I am dreaming
That's why I always wake up screaming

My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for, maybe, "Go to H*ll"

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.