Ok yah this does suck, especially knowing that you were the one that pretty much f
ked things up. But I agree with the above stated comments about finding something that you like to do and will get your mind off of things. It's a personal thing...some people like to deal with losses...of any kind...by themselves, while others like to go out and be with friends, read books, watch a lot of movies, drive, work on their car, go to the gym...whatever. But you definitely need to find that thing or couple of things that'll take your mind off of regretting what you did. Sure you'll never totally forget about what happened but, with time, your heart will heal and there will be another girl in your life that is even more special than the previous one. Everything happens for a reason...you might end up with the girl you blew it with (I don't know the circumstances so i don't know if this will happen or not) and this is just a test of your relationships. It just sucks that you have to loose a love to realize you loved the person to begin with....or to find another one then.