[GT40FIED]

So tonight in my regular ritual of drinking and whatnot, I came to a conclusion. Infomercials (you know...those programs that make toxic chemicals and ridiculously obsolete items seem necessary) have to stop now...or at the very least change. I saw one tonight for a vacuum cleaner. I'm not even sure which one. The problem was with how they portrayed the use of the vacuum vs. other brands (supposedly the "top model", ignoring the fact that if their model is, in fact, so fucking cool, that it would be the "top model"). I feel that this infomercial is pretty typical. They invite some sort of challenge of "conventional" products and proceed to totally destroy the competition in some sort of "challenge". But while I was watching the thing, this woman fumbled around with "the competition's" vacuum like she was some sort of palsey victim. I mean seriously...pigs can manipulate joysticks, yet this dumb twat can't work a fucking vacuum cleaner? Look...I don't have arms and I can work a fucking vacuum cleaner folks. This is such a common thread in these fucking things that it's ridiculous. If they had a contest where the two products finished relatively close but the "new and improved" model won by a small margin, I'd probably be more impressed. But when some dipshit cunt fumbles with simple everyday equipment I suffer a small stroke due to the fact that, while she's got the arms, I'm about 100 IQ points more intelligent. So, in the interest of my longevity, infomercials must be banned. That...or they can start looking more like a product analysis rather than blatant propaganda for shitty overpriced crap (yeah...they throw in a second one for free just because they think they'll make some more money).