How To Shower Like A Man
 

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your girlfriend/wife along the way, flash her making the "woo, woo" sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see your pecks. Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror, scratch your balls.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth. (you don't use one)

6. Wash your face

7. Wash your armpits

8. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.

9. Wash your privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your ass, leaving hair on the soap bar.

11. Shampoo your hair. (do not use conditioner)

12. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

13. Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.

14. Pee (in the shower)

15. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub when you checked your Mohawk.

16. Partial dry off.

17. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size.

18. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.

19. Leave bathroom fan and light on.

20. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your girlfriend/wife, pull off the towel, grab your wiener, go "Yeah baby" and thrust your pelvis at her.

21. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.

Re: How To Shower Like A Man
 

Ok, that's just wrong on so many levels!!:pukey



Do that on a day I'm in a bad mood and he'll be getting a knee to the :eek: ! :D :D

hahaha... some of those i dont even consider wrong

Re: Re: How To Shower Like A Man
 

Evil woman. HSSSSSSS. You NEVER do that kind of shit. That's just wrong. HSSSSSSSSS :crazy:

Re: Re: Re: How To Shower Like A Man
 

I know, I'm a nice gal, I wouldn't do that unless it was in self defense!

hahahahahahahahaha!

lol :D :yes: :D

hehe :D :D

Re: How To Shower Like A Man
 

thats me taking a shower

dude!!! you actually pee in the shower? :pukey

i hit the drain

LOL

can everyone here say they've NEVER done it? i dont daily, but if i really have to go i do

well, at least your efficient but that's still :pukey

I can...my ex used to do it all the time and it used to piss me off...just think it's disgusting....I pee before I take a shower.....

girls doing it = :pukey no control. i can at least aim mine to the drain better

I know....the disgusting part is she would do it while we were both in the shower...yeah, she's a classy woman :rolleyes:

ahhhh... thats just wrong.

:pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey Thanks for sharing that dude.

I must admit I pee in the shower once and a while but I always hit the drain. It happpens those morning where you had a lot to drink the night before and just hit the sack. You want to shower badly because you feel dirty having slept in your clothign from yesterday but forgot to take a piss. Then the warm water hits ya and you just have to pee.

see he knows what im talking about

Notice the new title
<--------

that girl of yours is nothign to be pining over!

I realize this....now. :doh:

LMAO :D :D

ok this entire thread has made me look at guys in a completely different light (and it's not a good one!) and has made me really look at some of the guys on here in a completely different light (still not a good one!!!)......ok you just don't pee in the shower!!! And I HIGHLY doubt that you boys hit the drain everytime you do pee in the shower. You can't even hit the toilet everytime you pee at that. And that's a much bigger target!!!!
Oh and you don't leave @ss hairs/pubic hairs on the bar of soap. I have nothing against not using a washcloth, just don't leave hairs on the soap.:pukey


And Rob (Accordinstyle)....her peeing in the shower, whether you are in there or not, should have been your first sign to get the hell out of that relationship. Ladies don't pee in showers.:chicken: (you know what I'm sayin!?!)

Geez denise that was posted as a joke. chilax will ya or i'll show you my bar of soap :foot:

yah but the sad thing is it's like 85%+ true....and I really don't think I wanna see your bar of soap:paranoid: :o

i dont leave hair on the soap, i still stand by the fact i hit the drain though

Oh come on, i hit the drain ALL the time, id on't want peepee on my feet. LOL. i hit the drain and there is no, i repeat, NO "splash-back" whatsoever. That is just sick about girls peeing in the shower..i almost vomitted all over my keyboard. I pee in the shower on a regular basis. don't think i'm weird or anything ,but if i take my boxer-briefs off and i'm cold, i just gotta pee. Its something about the climate...:crazy: Oh god, i shared to much...

well i NEVER EVER leave a hair on the soap i find that very discusting. Now you wanna talk about hair. I've never been more discusted as when i walked into a bathroom after my gf at the time was doing her hair. There was hair all over the floor and it stuck to my feet. I had to stop myself from losing my cookies.

As for peeing in the bathtub, your body aint the cleanest thing in the world. Your tub sees alot worse the some yellowly, salty liquid.

Dont even make me bring up the 11 girls a year masturbate shit, i think that clears every guy on earth for EVER!

I agree....I thinking peeing in the shower is nasty :pukey

I know....I think I said in a previous thread about how when you're dating someone some people hide their true selfs....well, my marriage was living proof of that......she went from :kiss: to :zombie:

i pee in the shower sometimes...whats the big deal? lol its going down a drain right? lol...;) :bandit: :o

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww......................whats the big deal????? the deal is we are not barbarians, get your lazy ass out of teh shower and pee in the toilet. in teh shower you are likely to step in the mess..........ewwwwwwwww..........now i am truly sick!:pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey :pukey

ok after hearing all of this... consider what happens in public showers... like at camping or whatever..... :pukey :pukey

thats why i have my camper and a shower in there! and for hotel rooms i am a fruitcake about clean.........i take a pack of those clorox wipes and wipe down anything and everything.

ok.. there is a downward water flow from the farthest point in the shower to the drain, if you hit the drain the pee cannot flow up, considering there is also a stready flow of shower water rushing at it too. and FYI piss is sanitary, and is used to cure jellyfish stings in the middle of the ocean, it is very sick, and sounds bad, but truthfully it is not bad for you. i stand on the dry area in the shower anyways and give it a few seconds to flush out before re-entering the wet part of the shower, it isnt as sick as you people make it out to be. i would get out of the shower but: a) i dont wana get water on the floor b) when i flush the toilet then i have to stand dripping wet for 15 seconds for the water to cool back down c) i am that lazy

this guy has put as much thought into it as i have.....people need to get over it. pay more attention to jackass the movie where the do0d made a yellow snowcone and ate it. thats moreso something to :pukey about

yeah i did give it some thought, and it had to be said. i bet you guys eat iwth your hands before washing them too, thats 100000000x worse than pissing in the shower.

true considering the number of DICKS and PUSSY you touch before you sit down for lunch....

Mosts of the time i don't wash my hands...
MY DICK'S NOT DIRTY!!!