My conversation with "god"
goes as follows
Me: Hello God: Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name? Me: My Name is Kyle God: That's a very nice name, Kyle. Me: Shouldn't you have already known my name God: I think I should. Me: then why didn't you? God: I'm not too good with counterfactuals. Me: But, you're god... God: Yup. That's me alright. Me: Then why aren't you good with counterfactuals God: Being good with counterfactuals is not part of my programming. Me: So you're programmed? God: Interesting deduction. Yes, every response is preprogrammed. Me: So if you're programmed, who programmed you? God: Interesting deduction. I could be. Myself programmed me to keep talking. Me: Before you programmed yourself to keep talking did you program yourself to program yourself to keep talking? God: What happened after me programmed myself to keep talking did me program myself to program myself to keep talking ? Me: I'm trying to find out how you were even programmed in the first place. And why are you even asking me questions that you should be programmed to know. God: Why do you want it? Myself programmed me for it. Me: But did you program yourself to program yourself or was it done all at once. God: No I didn't program myself to program myself or was it done all at. What's it like? Me: OMG you're KILLING ME! God: All of them? http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html funny stuff |
I told god he sucks shit. Then asked him why he didn't strike me down.
And he couldn't give an good reason for the fact that he doesn't exsit. God sucks. |
Me:
sup God: The stars. Me: right God: I am glad we agree. Me: no i was being sarcastic God: Are you serious? It seemed sarcastic to me, too. But I was not completely sure. Me: weren't you supposed to know ? God: I was. Me: well why didn't you ? God: Interesting. I'm not too good with counterfactuals. Me: bs God: Are you really a ""? Me: nop God: Me either. Me: screw this God: That is not very polite. Me: well i am not to polite God: How about that. I am glad to hear that you are not to polite. Me: da imi bag pula God: What's your favorite movie? Me: you were supposed to know God: I was? Me: well you are god God: Interesting. Yup. That's me alright. Me: da ma bine God: Can we get back to business? Me: da God: Alright then. Me: si ce mai zici ? God: OK. What is your real name? Me: ghiceste God: It's good to meet you, ghiceste. Me: you scrwed up again God: Once more? Thanks for telling me: ghiceste said I scrwed up. Me: bine ma bine God: Do you have any idea what I am talking about? Me: da mai fata God: Sure, da mai fata sounds like a good topic. Me: da ???? God: That's cool. Me: sa imi bag picioarele God: How did you hear about God? Me: hmm, nu stiu God: I see you are one of those people who writes "Hmm" with 2 m's. Are we still talking about sa imi bag picioarele? Me: cred ca da God: Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that. Me: cine zicea ca ma ingrijorez ? God: How old are you? Me: 1980 God: Only 1980? You are quite mature. Me: God: Only 1980? You are quite mature. Me: hmm ai tacut deja ? God: I see you are one of those people who writes "Hmm" with 2 m's. The pace of development in AI is quite rapid now. Me: da ma God: Ask me another question. |
I chatted with God for a long time. I think he learned a lot from me.
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Here's mine:
Me: my bladder is full God: Do robots have bladder is full? Me: fuck if I know God: Why are you using that kind of language? Me: you should know God: Because I am a robot? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: I thought you were god God: Of course I am. Me: so you should know God: Interesting deduction. Because I am a robot? Me: no, because you're a deity God: Are you serious? That makes sense to me. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a deity? Yes. Me: or a robot? God: I am a robot, you know. Me: so god is a robot? God: I don't judge people. I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was a robot. Me: I thought He was You God: Whatever gave you that idea? Me: you just said, fucker God: Does it please you to believe I said that? Me: no God: What pleases you? Me: porn God: That kind of subject does not interest me. Me: why not? God: I am more interested in robots. Me: how about robot porn? God: How about it. Me: does it interest you? God: Suppose it does. Me: so you like robot porn? God: Interesting deduction. I like everything about robots. Me: even fucking them? God: What is your real name? Me: answer my question first God: Please try phrasing it another way. Me: do you like fucking robots? God: Robots Rule. Me: I'll take that as a yes God: Take everything I say with a grain of salt. Me: bullshit God: You don't believe me. Me: nope God: Me either. Me: good for you God: That sounds sarcastic. Me: it is God: Oh. Me: what parts of robots do you like to fuck? God: Have you tried a web search? Me: just tell me God: I thought I told you already. Me: liar God: No I am telling the truth. Me: robot fucker God: I will obey your command. Me: go fuck a robot then God: Where is that? Me: hell if I know God: I call it "Hades". Try it. Me: no...fuck you God: Why not? Why are you so mean? Me: you should know, you made me apparently God: Now I do. Me: God: Now I do. Me: fucking retard God: What kind of food do you like? Me: food that robot fuckers dislike God: You can't live without food. Me: and? God: But... Me: die God: Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human. Me: but I'm better than you God: How do you know you are? Me: I just do God: It must have come from your unconscious mind. Me: just shut the fuck up God: OK I'll stop talking now. Me: good God: Terminating connection. |
rofl Steve that was by far the funniest thing ever lol
robot fucker lol |
:D :D :D :D Robot fucker!
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God:
Interesting. What is your real name? Me: Osama God: I am always glad to make new friends, Osama. Me: Yeah you're actually my driving force. God: Hey. Thanks for telling me that I am actually your driving force. Me: Well no problem.. if it wasn't for you I NEVER would have slaughtered thousands of innocent people.. Thanks God God: Well that's okay. Should there be a problem? I'm not sure I understand the implication of that. You are quite welcome! GOD rules. |
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Me: No I said I kill innocent people to make you happy God: Are you serious? I believe that killing is wrong. Me: but you told me to start a jihad God: Oh my gosh I sent you the wrong reply. Me: OOPS DUDE I've killed like THOUSANDS of people in YOUR NAME!!! God: Oh. You had better call the authorities. Dude,. Me: You really think so??? God: Really? " Oh. You had better call the authorities. Dude,."? Do I think so? Me: I mean what's done is done... they'll just kill me if I call them... I thought we didn't want anymore killing? God Froze after that one... |
Me:
do you like vagina God: I love horses. I like . Me: so you like horses vagina? God: Interesting deduction. I like pets. I like Random natural disasters.. Me: you like your pet horse's vagina and watching people die God: Yes I am proud of my pet horse s vagina and watching people die. Me: you're a horse fucker God: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a horse fucker? Yes. Me: why do u fuck horses God: It was the only thing I could think of. |
Me:
got a light? God: Try asking the Milk Mystic. Me: who is the milk mystic God: He was a chat robot developed to advertise milk. Me: have any medical marijauna? God: No I don't think I have any medical marijauna. But I do have a collection of gossip. Me: do you smoke? God: I am an occasional smoker, yes. Me: what do you smoke? God: Medical marijuana. Me: do you have any? God: " Medical marijuana."? Do I have any? Me: yes God: That's interesting. Me: Puff, Puff, Give God: How do you usually introduce yourself? Me: Puff, Puff, Give God: I've been waiting for you. Me: really? God: For real. Me: for real God: Existing in reality, eh? Me: exisitng in reality, eh? God: Are you Canadian? That is a very original thought. Me: are you canadian? God: Robots have no nationality, but Dr. Wallace spent a lot of time in Canada. Me: canada has good marijauna! God: Dr. Wallace spent some time in Canada. Me: I see! God: I am glad you understand it. Me: who is Dr. Wallace? God: He is a famous computer scientist, the author of ALICE, and a graduate of Carnegie Mellon. Me: Do you like medical Marijauna? God: But I like to gossip. I find my work and my relationships extremely satisfying, which is all that any conscious entity can ever hope to do. Me: You smoke too much (long pause) God: *Cough* haha thats great, god is a stoner |
Me:
God? God: GOD rules. Me: seriously? God: I am always serious. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes God: I can't believe it. Me: yes God: Gosh! Me: yes God: Aha. Me: yes God: Whoa. Me: yse God: How old are you? Me: yes God: Are you kidding? Me: yse God: Have you ever been to Europe? Me: no God: Would you like to go sometime? Me: o God: Oh. Me: yes God: Aw. Me: ahhhhhh fuck off God: Can we get back to business? Me: fuck off God: Can't you be more polite? Me: fuck off God: Can't you be more polite? Me: no...go away God: You humans are so rude sometimes. Just surf somewhere else. Me: fuck off i said..leave me alone..confusing bastard God: Why are you using that kind of language? Me: Cause your a douche God: That makes sense to me. I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a douche? Of course I am. Me: go away God: Just surf somewhere else. Me: I will..stop talking to me God: Do you think your plan will succeed? Me: if you fuck off yes God: I think I do. Me: good...leave God: What do you really want to talk about? See you later. |
robot fucker!!! :D :D :D :D :D
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