Feels so weird (long post)

[ebpda9]

here is how the story goes:

i met this girl 3 years ago, when she just came from romania. some of our common friends introduced me to her, just to help her and tell her how things are going out here with school, college and all other crap. Soon i fell for her and we had a small talk, told her how i feel about her, and she felt about the same for me, but we agreed that we should stay just friends, because her dad is a fu*khead, and won't let her out, with any guys except if she was in groups with other girls. For 2 years we continued to see eachother as friends, she was going out to the library, and i was supposed to pick her out from there and go wherever we wanted. after those 2 years i can say i did not feel anything for her, other than just best friends, she was my little sister, that i never had. everything was fine till friday, when we she had the prom, and went with a guy, and then they became friends. Last night i talked to her, and she told me that he is her bf. She told me that he is a nice guy, she knew him for a while and helped eachother with homework and stuff. they were also in extracuricullar activities toghether, but were not toghther until prom night. In a way i'm happy for her, that she is finally able to have a life, but on the other hand i feel like "Somebody just shoot me !" The weird thing is that i did not feel like this while she was still single. anyway i did not get anything from her like i don't wanna talk to u, or i don't wanna see u again. Last thing she told me was that i'm still her best friend. sorry for the long post but i needed to vent. i guess all this time i felt something more for her than i should have felt for my best friend.

[spoogenet]

As the old saying goes...."You don't realize what you have until you lose it."

As long as you have her as a close friend, you win. Relationships come and go, friends are forever. Just hang in there....

b

[bootstrap]

its funny she got with him on prom night... that relationship is never gonna last

[ShEaNy]

wow...i went through the same thing man....My friend met this girl over the net and it actually turned out good...she was nice, pretty and really wanted to be our freind. Well after a while she went out with my best freind for over a year i think...and they broke up like 5 months ago....since then i've taken a "shine" to her...and i told her how i felt and she said to me..."If i ever got anyother BF it would be you." i was like GREAT cause i really like her.....just 3 weeks ago she gets ANOTHER Bf...NOt ME ;( iwas so mad and upset and i haven't talked to her for a while (cause shes never around now) and i miss her....and both of us are going to grad together..if she has a bf or not....which is going to be weird for me.... i hope me and her are still freinds.... sometimes life sucks! oh well!

[theonlypunk]

This sounds like you changed roles for her. You two started off as could be's but you put aside your romantic feelings because of her father and 2 years later she decides she wants this other guy as her bf.

Dude I must say it sounds like you didn't try hard enough in the first place. If you really cared for her more then a friend you would have over come the problems. I have tons of friends who are seeing girls who their fathers dont want them to date, alot of them are asian and a few of them are from ex-russian countries.

Theres something I've been living by for most of my life, if your friends with a girl for more then 6 months and never go further then that, then you never will nor should you. Now i'm not saying you have to have sex with her and that as your gf she might not be your best friend but im sure you know what i mean.

side note this internet thing sounds like a mistcommunication :(

[bessiebeater]

Originally posted by theonlypunk
Theres something I've been living by for most of my life, if your friends with a girl for more then 6 months and never go further then that, then you never will nor should you.


Boy am I glad I don't live by this rule. My boyfriend and I were really good friends for 11 years before we started dating......I cannot imagine being in a better relationship, because we were friends first, we knew pretty much everything about each other up front, and we grew up together, we know each others families....it's great! I was in a previous long term relationship with someone I wasn't friends with first......and now I wish I had never been in that relationship. Friends first is always the way to go.....even if it takes longer than six months...and remember if its meant to be, it will be!

Keep your head up

:)

[mt.biker]

Dude! thats horrible!

well i must say its happened to me just dont hold it against her, shes still a good friend either way and maybe she wasn't ment to date you first. You can be the shoulder she crys on when it ends, that is if it does end

[ebpda9]

i'm not holding anything against her. she is my best friend. just the news came a bit unexpected. that's it. i'm a lot better now, plus i enjoy being single: no dates to remeber, no fights about how i'm dressed, no screaming for screetching the tires.

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by hondaman-iac
i'm not holding anything against her. she is my best friend. just the news came a bit unexpected. that's it. i'm a lot better now, plus i enjoy being single: no dates to remeber, no fights about how i'm dressed, no screaming for screetching the tires.

if she screems she can walk is what i say.

[alwaysbed]

i know how the situation is exactly, i was with a girl that i was totally sprung off of for 2 years, i loved her like no other. but she was very religious so we could never take our relationship to "the next step" well we broke up after two years of not getting any, and less then a month later her and her new boyfriend of 3 weeks were "living together"... odd. aye?

[mt.biker]

i guess what us guys can take from this is that girls often dont know what they want and are completly erratic.

[4jacks]

You guys fail to realize that the freind zone and the twilight zone are one in the same...

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by 4jacks
You guys fail to realize that the freind zone and the twilight zone are one in the same...
LMAO

when it comes to most girls i couldn't agree more!

either they just want to stay friends and you want more or they want more and its like you'd be dating your sister:pukey

[civic_north]

Hey hondaman-iac

You have to watch, sometimes it's the ones you can't have that you want. Make sure this is a true friendship. You don't want to lose a good friend because of lust!

mt.biker, you responded to my reply on First Date, about the girl with the flowers, I'm still hung up on her. I must be insane.

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by civic_north
Hey hondaman-iac

You have to watch, sometimes it's the ones you can't have that you want. Make sure this is a true friendship. You don't want to lose a good friend because of lust!

mt.biker, you responded to my reply on First Date, about the girl with the flowers, I'm still hung up on her. I must be insane.

dam bro its been how long? you haven't found anyone you've liked since that girl?

[civic_north]

I didn't say I haven't found anyone since, I've been out on a few dates, but things just keep reminding me of her.......This is ****ed. Just a good thread to vent I guess

Civic_North

[ebpda9]

i know what you are feeling. right now i'm fine and i could go out and date, but somebody else came to my mind, and her definitelly i can't forget

[Racing Rice]

The problem you never thought you had feelings for her is because you had her to yourself whenever you wanted her for the most part, now that she is seeing someone else you know that it wont be that way anymore because she will be spending a lot more time with her man. This is probably gonna suck pretty bad for you, since you got use to being around her so much.

The only thing I can tell you is keep being the friend that you have been, and if something happens be there for her. Then if you get the chance next time try not to let it pass you by.;)

Good Luck.

[Whiteclipse99]

Originally posted by spoogenet
As the old saying goes...."You don't realize what you have until you lose it."

As long as you have her as a close friend, you win. Relationships come and go, friends are forever. Just hang in there....

b

Well put, I couldn't of said it better! :yes:

And about the whole being freinds for a long time before getting into a relationship topic, I don't know how you do it. I've got a lot of guy friends, and over time I've learned so much about them, that they're like my brothers. It would be too weird to start anything with them cause we've crossed that line. That line between friends/possible boyfriend to friend/like my brother.

[DsBlu01CivEX]

one thing to say....watch the movie Boys and Girls. This thread for some reason totally reminds me of that movie. It's kinda like a teen chick movie...but it's decent. Might learn a lil from that movie too. And I have the same guy friends as Whiteclipse (duh!) and yah we've passed the "i could possibly see myself dating you" line to "hey you're like the brother I never had". We always tell them that and they get pissed at us for it. But I wouldn't change any of the relationships I had with them if I knew it would ruin all of our friendships. I'd rather remain single with a whole bunch of great guy friends and date around.

[FeelMyRide]

Originally posted by DsBlu01CivEX
one thing to say....watch the movie Boys and Girls. This thread for some reason totally reminds me of that movie. It's kinda like a teen chick movie...but it's decent. Might learn a lil from that movie too.

I learned from that movie.. she was a total hoe and Jason Biggs is HOT (but we knew that)

But back to the topic.. I think you should be there as her friend for now

[civic_north]

Hey Racing Rice

She's not seeing anyone, but I think it's the fact that I can't have her.

Civic_North

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by civic_north
Hey Racing Rice

She's not seeing anyone, but I think it's the fact that I can't have her.

Civic_North

would you care to remind us/me why this is?

[sparklingxtasy]

Girls are wierd... i dunno... but so are guys so looks like we're all screwed... lol

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by sparklingxtasy
Girls are wierd... i dunno... but so are guys so looks like we're all screwed... lol

i must admit your right, they are wierd but doesnt that make it all the more fun?

[ChrisCantSkate]

no one ever knows what they want untill its too late.

[cutiepy701]

Originally posted by mt.biker
i guess what us guys can take from this is that girls often dont know what they want and are completly erratic.

DITTO, as with guys, I think the biggest problem of relationship failures is that we don't know ourselfs first off.
Seriously, how can you know someone else inside and out, what makes them tick, what makes them laugh, what makes them squirm......all those little things, if you don't even know who you are.

People are so quick to jump in a relationship for the "companionship" when all they probably need is a friend. There wouldn't be as many broken hearts. Some of the worst times I have had, I've gotten thru because of my best friend who is a male. You don't have to be in a "relationship" in order to feel that need and support and understanding.

"sometimes the hardest things to see, are the things right in front of you"

Damn, I should be a psychologist....just don't wanna go to school for 9 friggin years.:crazy: