IALuder
10-08-2005, 07:04 PM
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.
"Careful CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my goodness!
"You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN
THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my!
"WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to
STICK!
"Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to
me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you
CRAZY?
"Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You
know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE
SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What's wrong with you? You think I
don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it
feels like when I'm driving."
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The Saddle Horn
An attractive woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down. An Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a near by town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off.
The ride was uneventful except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a "Whoop" so loud that it would echo from the surrounding hills. When they arrived in town, the Indian let her off at the local service station, yelled one final "Yahoo" and rode off.
"What did you do to get that Indian so excited?" asked the service station attendant.
"Nothing," shrugged the woman, I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto his saddle horn so I wouldn't fall off.
"Lady," the attendant said, "Indians ride bareback!"
Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.
"Careful CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my goodness!
"You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN
THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my!
"WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to
STICK!
"Careful ... CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to
me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you
CRAZY?
"Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You
know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE
SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What's wrong with you? You think I
don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it
feels like when I'm driving."
----------------------------------------------------
The Saddle Horn
An attractive woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down. An Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a near by town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off.
The ride was uneventful except that every few minutes the Indian would let out a "Whoop" so loud that it would echo from the surrounding hills. When they arrived in town, the Indian let her off at the local service station, yelled one final "Yahoo" and rode off.
"What did you do to get that Indian so excited?" asked the service station attendant.
"Nothing," shrugged the woman, I merely sat behind him on the horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto his saddle horn so I wouldn't fall off.
"Lady," the attendant said, "Indians ride bareback!"