Morning Wood

[GirlRacer]

Ok boys. Look at the title and explain this one to me. I've never understood...why is it always hard in the mornings?:confused:

[Accord Man]

when you gotto go pipi, it becomes more sensitive.. In some cases, much more sensitive.. Which means it is very easily stimulated.

um, I aint saying more.. :paranoid:

[juvenile]

Originally posted by Accord Man
when you gotto go pipi, it becomes more sensitive.. In some cases, much more sensitive.. Which means it is very easily stimulated.

um, I aint saying more.. :paranoid:
Yup.

[GirlRacer]

ahaha- but it seems like even if some don't have to pee....it's still hard, so what's the deal?

[Accord Man]

pleasant dreams?!

[juvenile]

It's just one of the "myths" of life. Just like why do men always leave the toilet seat up, and women want it down. Some things just can't be fully explained. lol

[widowmaker]

hmmm,morning wood.no,it isnt from the morning wood fairy like on ren and stimpy ;)anybody remember that episode???ok,so im a loser.anyways,morning wood.from what i understand,during the morning hours are when a males hormone levels are at their peak.i dont really remember the specific hormones that cause this,just remember that due to this overload of hormones in the morning hours,an erection in the morning is produced.so,theres the scientific explanation,and yes,i realize i sound like a complete nerd,guess thats what i get for majoring in a health field,lol.
but still,the ren and stimpy explanation is so much more funny:yes:

[TeriyakiBroccoli]

^ rofl.

[Duckydos]

OK, this is my understanding.
When you sleep, your heart rate slows down. When you wake up (and become active) your heart rate speeds up and your body gets a rush of blood. And what causes hard-ons? Blood flow. So, that's why you get morning wood.

I guess it could be right, but by that same logic, you would get wood during a football game or a race (some of us do, lol).

I don't know. All that I know is that it makes damn hard to take a piss in the morning. You have 3 options. The first is to try to hold it in till the wood goes away. The 2nd is to try to brace yourself on the wall and hope that you can point that fvcker downwards. The 3rd I have never tried *cough* but I guess you could just hop in the shower and pee on the wall. :no:

-Ducky

[GirlRacer]

ahahahaha! that's disgusting! Well, I think it's funny. :yes:

[GirlRacer]

O ya- and just a lil interesting fact here.... widowmaker is a male nurse, (and a damn cute one) so he's probably got the best explanation of all of us!

Also, for you boys with a g/f or wife... does it bother you around that time if your wife is curled up against you and does that thing us girls do where we kinda move our butt and it brushes against it?;)

[mt.biker]

that doesn't bother me, its dam nice. Often it starts something...

[GirlRacer]

:yes: ;)

[spoogenet]

Nothing wrong with a little butt rubbin. Or a big butt rubbin. ;)

I buy the hormone explanation the best. But it's not like all guys always get morning wood. I get it all the time when I'm spoonin with my honey, though.

b

[BlackWolf]

I always thought it was a pee meter. Like, how much you have to pee when you wake up. :rolleyes:

[juvenile]

Originally posted by BlackWolf
I always thought it was a pee meter. Like, how much you have to pee when you wake up. :rolleyes:

LMAO :D :D :D

[SolPol]

Eh hmm, who cares? It's there, now help me get rid of it ;)

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by SolPol
Eh hmm, who cares? It's there, now help me get rid of it ;)


haha so true. Its great when you wake up and go for it.... gf used to come over early in the morning. I'd leave the back door unlocked and she'd let herself in and join me in bed. I often didn't even wake up until later, and then with that wood... haha it always gets the morning off to a great start!

[widowmaker]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
O ya- and just a lil interesting fact here.... widowmaker is a male nurse, (and a damn cute one) so he's probably got the best explanation of all of us!

Also, for you boys with a g/f or wife... does it bother you around that time if your wife is curled up against you and does that thing us girls do where we kinda move our butt and it brushes against it?;)
you had to throw in the male nurse part didnt ya. ;) and no,it doesnt bother us when a girl does that:thumbsup: i enjoy it at least,hehe.

[ebpda9]

i thinlk it has something to do with sleep jerking :rolleyes: :o ;)

[GirlRacer]

Originally posted by spoogenet
I get it all the time when I'm spoonin with my honey, though.


:yes: ahahaha! This is true and happens all the time. It's adorable!;)

lol

[widowmaker]

yeah,i agree,it doesnt help the situation having a beautiful girl lying right next to you ;)but then again,i guess it does help the situation :yes:

[SolPol]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
:yes: ahahaha! This is true and happens all the time. It's adorable!;)

lol

Well, it would happen even if you weren't there, so don't go gettin' too proud.

And the butt thing just about rules. Girls rock. :bandit:

[zm_dawg]

Morning Wood.......thats like my excercise for the day trying to take the first pee...

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by zm_dawg
Morning Wood.......thats like my excercise for the day trying to take the first pee...

sometimes its a fight I almost lose...

[SolPol]

I think the toilet rim is the real loser.

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by SolPol
I think the toilet rim is the real loser.
i rarely miss but often its almost a super man type position that makes sure it all gets in the bowl.

[SolPol]

Fun ain't it.

[Shot 2 Hel]

who cares when i get up im just happy to know its there

and does it ever bother you girls when you are cuddling or whatnot to feel that poking?

[BlackWolf]

As long as it's poking the right area.....I sure don't want that in my face when I first wake up......."AAAHHHH! What the h*ll is that?!!" It's kinda traumatic, if you get my drift. Now, if it's in the lower region ........."OOOHHH YEAHHHHH!!!" I love that first thing in the morning......:yes:

[GirlRacer]

Originally posted by Shot 2 Hel
does it ever bother you girls when you are cuddling or whatnot to feel that poking?

;) Nope-doesn't bother me in the least. I think its cute.:yes:

[Shot 2 Hel]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
;) Nope-doesn't bother me in the least. I think its cute.:yes:

now that i think about it, some might find it flattering

[imports_only98]

when my ex and i were together....i used to love waking up to him for play time. it was the best. sometimes i REALLY miss that.

[GirlRacer]

Yup, seeeee...... it's flattering when all you have to do is move and it gets worse too! :yes: ;) :D :D :D :D :D

[pdiggitydogg]

look at all the fun i missed when i was away...morning wood and all...

it doesnt always happen...at least for me. I have to agree that its just one of those myths of life that probably will never be explained fully

[GirlRacer]

Originally posted by pdiggitydogg
I have to agree that its just one of those myths of life that probably will never be explained fully

On the contrary! Widowmaker's got it all mapped up, read before these posts abit....;)

[ohiochica]

god i miss having a guy to cuddle with, my pillow sucks!!!! :::::::sigh::::::::

[GirlRacer]

I feel ya there girl.:no:

[widowmaker]

yeah,waking up in the morning to a pretty girl in your arms and her nuzzling against you is awesome;) wish id happened more often,i'd even settle for only on the weekends;)

[ohiochica]

:::::::::::::::::::really big sigh now:::::::::::::

here i am putting all of my ex's race car pics in a box......god i miss cuddling up with someone at night. i dont miss him at all i just miss that warm fuzzy feeling. i am soooooo ready to just settle down and no one i have dated so far is worthy.

[widowmaker]

Yeah,i feel ya.all i need is a girl to be with,dont care about playin the field anymore.gets old.i miss that feeling of being with that one person knowing theyre just as happy with just being with you.

[ohiochica]

i am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tired of games guys play!

[widowmaker]

Originally posted by ohiochica
i am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tired of games guys play!
i dunno,ive had that conversation with a group of males and females,and it seems like its just a human trait.not just a one-sided thing here.guys and girls play games equally.just hard to find a girl or guy who wont play games anymore i guess.its kindve sad when ya think about it actually

[ohiochica]

i sais that jokingly to get a reaction i know many girls that play head games. jsuta human nature thing. i personally dont think i play games but i also know that "i have issues".....lol

[Shot 2 Hel]

Originally posted by ohiochica
"i have issues".....lol

we all have issues

*thinks of the offspring song "shes got issues"

[GirlRacer]

awwwww... Becky! Maybe something will work out for you soon.;) :yes:

[mt.biker]

no one enjoy's waking up alone, it just amazes me how many people can't find good people to date. I wonder why that is?

[SolPol]

Because most of them suck. :yes:

[spoogenet]

Funny how we go from flying superman to the good ole "no good people to date" topic. :)

Dating is like driving, most of the ones you encounter aren't any good.

Two things that are nice to wake up to. A girl's head on my chest or her butt snuggling against me. Spooooooooooooooooooon. *sigh* one of these days.....

b

[mt.biker]

Originally posted by SolPol
Because most of them suck. :yes:

amen to that brotha.... if only it was so ;(

[SolPol]

Yeah, I didn't mean it like that.

But that would rule. :yes: :yes: :yes:

[ShagginJet]

Sometimes morning wood get's you something you wanted but didn't have the nerve to ask for. Just cause you're sleeping next to someone doesn't always mean you're having sex with them.

For all you ladies who are looking for someone to cudle and wake up with the next morning. PM me when you're in the LA area, my door is always open.

[GirlRacer]

ahahahaha-ya, it helps us read your mind.:yes:

[Grip72]

hahaha, this is one of the funniest threads i've read entirely. HAHA. Good stuff. ya know that scene on "Me, Myself & Irene" where Jim Carrey wakes up after sex and can't aim his piss? WEll i have had that before and i actually had to use a Tilex bottle or Scope or something of that sort to direct it. It was insane..no lie. Anyways, i really really severly miss spooning with a hot chick. I am a sucker for cuddling. I could just lye there with a honey and watch movies for days sometimes. I haven't had morning wood in sooo long, weird.

[GirlRacer]

That really happens?????!?!?!

[Racing Rice]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
That really happens?????!?!?!

Hell yeah it does.. :o

[ShagginJet]

I've had that happen several times.... it's kind of funny and shitty at the same time. It's funny when you're aiming right on and it's spraying all over. It's shitty when it sprays on you and or you have to clean up the mess.

Still waitig on those PM's.

[02_Si]

Dude, this is probably the funniest topic I've read on these forums.. I think I have the answer to the morning tree trunk... when you sleep, your body goes "offline"... when you start to wake up, your body realizes this before your conscience can so your body a sort of "self test" and kind of reboots itself. The blood flow is actually sent to ever part of your body when you wake up... The reason you sometimes don't wake up with a wood all depends on how you sleep. If you sleep in a position where blood flow is limited to the tree stump, then the morning harvest will be HUGE... but if your flow is decent in your sleep, then you might not experience wood at all or just a semi...
Of course sleeping with a naked beautiful woman can help get you horny when you wake up.. it must be the smell of sex in the air. :yes: (Homer voice) MMMMM sex... uuggghhh. (drool)

[GirlRacer]

LOL! What causes the pee thing-where you can't aim?!? That' just insane

[02_Si]

sometimes it just won't aim right... but the hardest thing to do is to take a pi$$ while you have a wood... then you gotta do the bend over thing while you piss. :yes: otherwise you'll get it all over the place and maybe even on your face. ;) LOL... yeah, the pressures of being a guy... :o

[GirlRacer]

Originally posted by 02_Si
and maybe even on your face.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA.... that is CRAZY!

[02_Si]

I know all the guys here know the bend over boner pi$$... LOL.. yeah... there's no way I'm bending my schwang that far... it'll snap! :pukey ... Man, can it snap? What would happen?

[GirlRacer]

no no-it's not a bone. You can't break it. bwahahaha

that's insane that happens, I just don't see how it's possible.:confused:

[Racing Rice]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
no no-it's not a bone. You can't break it. bwahahaha

Correct, all it is, is tissue that fills with blood. You dont have to worry about tripping over something, as you walking in the bathroom with your morning wood and breaking something.

Wouldnt that suck if you could, and you had to have it put in a cast though.:o

[juvenile]

Originally posted by Racing Rice
Wouldnt that suck if you could, and you had to have it put in a cast though.:o
*shudders* THANKS MAN!! lol I was about to goto sleep...*shudders* :o

[02_Si]

I dunno... I read once in a mag that guys can snap their soldier... you become impotent <=== spelling? .... Now that would suck... That would hurt like no other with a mother.

[Kyle]

on the drew carey show...drew fell off the bed onto his dick and sprang it...lol
dunno if that can really happen in real life...but whatever

[GirlRacer]

Imagine having to put a cast on it and walk around lookin like you're at full mast all the time...:no: :paranoid:

[Kyle]

yeah that would suck...

[Wabster]

You CAN "break" it.

[juvenile]

*closes his ears* STOP IT PEOPLE! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!! ASSHOLES!!! *can't fall asleep now* :no: :mad: hehe bastards...

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
Imagine having to put a cast on it and walk around lookin like you're at full mast all the time...:no: :paranoid:

You wouldn't have to cast it... that's only so that bones can reset themselves. I think it'd be more of like muscle strain.

[GirlRacer]

interesting... I'm at a loss for words...:paranoid: :nono:

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
interesting... I'm at a loss for words...:paranoid: :nono:

That's usually the response i get with Morn Wood... :yes: ;) :yes:

[GirlRacer]

Originally posted by ShagginJet
That's usually the response i get with Morn Wood... :yes: ;) :yes:

:D :D :D :biting:

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by GirlRacer
:biting:

NO PLEASE!!

[GirlRacer]

BWAHAHAHA:D :D :D :D

[Zybach]

THis is completely off the topic. But remember on Jackass, Knoxville stuffed a fake dildo down his pants and walked around with it? The shoe store seen was a classic.. ::D:

[ShagginJet]

You guys ever notice your wood creeping to the side. Like when you stand up you just have this buldge across your jeans to the left or right, sometimes running down your thigh...?

Isn't that some annoying shit sometimes....? Unless there is a girl around, then she get's the idea real quick.

[silver]

you guys familiar with the term "touching water"
it's when you sit on a toilet and your wangage touches the water in the toilet. it's a rite of passage among my friends, you're not cool until you do that.

[GirlRacer]

its funny when this happens. Easily fixed though. Just have your girl hop in front you and you two walk close.

Fun to do that sometimes just to do it.:yes:

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by silver
you guys familiar with the term "touching water"
it's when you sit on a toilet and your wangage touches the water in the toilet. it's a rite of passage among my friends, you're not cool until you do that.

NASTY!! Your wang is hanging with the kids that you dropped at the pool.... NASTY!!

[silver]

Originally posted by ShagginJet
NASTY!! Your wang is hanging with the kids that you dropped at the pool.... NASTY!!

it's supposed to hit before you drop them, no poopie dick here.

[GirlRacer]

why would that be kewl? cuz it proves you have a hose? Just pull 'er out!:yes:

[SLP 01 WS6]

i've heard it's caused when you sleep and your baldder is pressed on something else can't remember off hand but that's what causes it. my girl loves them i wake up to suprises all the time.:yes:

[Maxvla]

http://www.maxvla.com/smiley/laugh.gif again!

uh.. girlracer.. two active threads about male parts.. is there something you want to tell us?

and for the record. morning wood doesn't happen EVERY single day. at least not for me :paranoid:

[silver]

i understand morning wood as your body's way of getting blood flow down there when there isn't enough. it's how we keep it alive.

[Shot 2 Hel]

who cares as long as its just there... thats all i care about

[BlackWolf]

Originally posted by ShagginJet
You guys ever notice your wood creeping to the side. Like when you stand up you just have this buldge across your jeans to the left or right, sometimes running down your thigh...?

Isn't that some annoying shit sometimes....? Unless there is a girl around, then she get's the idea real quick.


We call 'em leftys and rightys. We like 'em like that 'cause we can see what ya'll got. I especially like it when the jeans got the wear mark there 'cause I can tell you like to use "it" often and well. :yes: or just a really healthy libido.......:banana: :wave: Hi, have we met?

[ShagginJet]

That usually only happens when bumping and grinding at a club. I have myself trained... It usually doesn't come up unless it knows it's going to be used. exceptions being some extremely intelligent and stimulating conversation with a woman, morning wood, and a good bumpin and grindin. It's crazy how just conversing with the right woman can be a turn on.

[BlackWolf]

So, that means you're "up" now?? ;) :yes:

[ShagginJet]

Working on it, could use a picture though.... :yes:

[BlackWolf]

I'll post one when I get my laptop! :luck:

The avatar is the closest I can do for now...........

[ShagginJet]

If you look anything like that, all i have to say is ::in a Homer voice:: DROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!

[BlackWolf]

Thanks hun, that's soo sweet! :kiss:

[ShagginJet]

I think we should keep that information to PM's.

[BlackWolf]

K...

[mylittlecivic]

If I even barely touch my b/f he's got it, allll the time he has one pracitally does he just not know how to control it?:confused:

[GirlRacer]

:yes: That's how my X was. I could barely brush him and he was at full mast.

[Kyle]

i'm the same way...i really don't know why...but it's just what happens...we're just horny people...

[BlackWolf]

That's why they say men have two heads, each with a mind of it's own. Having your man "up" all the time really isn't that bad, ladies....it's a good thing.....it means the little one likes you....:yes: ;) hehehehehe, sorry, I couldn't resist. I loved it when my ex was up all the time and the bf before him just never could get it up all the time. I knew it wasn't me, but you can only take that for so long w/o taking it personal, ya know? It's like whats wrong? Why doesn't mini-me like me? :confused: :mad:

[ShagginJet]

lol... I'm so glad I can get it up whenever need be. I'm also glad that it doesn't just come "up" whenever it wants... It's not easy walking around a mall or department store with a wood.

[BlackWolf]

hehhehehe.............he said........wood..........

[02black_Accord]

i got an erection when i was 9 while getting a physical

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by 02black_Accord
i got an erection when i was 9 while getting a physical

::Ewwwww:: :pukey

[SolPol]

Hope the Dr. was a chick.

[BlackWolf]

Double EEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!! I bet your dad was proud.....That's my boy! :rolleyes:

[ShagginJet]

lol....

[GirlRacer]

eh.... I'm hoping it was a girl Dr. too...:paranoid: :confused:

[Shot 2 Hel]

have something to tell us man? :D

[sohc_vtec 2NR]

Originally posted by 02black_Accord
i got an erection when i was 9 while getting a physical

:toofunny: ...anywho, i saw on discovery channel or tlc that morning wood is caused by the peak of testosterone in the mornin'...so that should validate what somebody said earlier about the wood in this thread..:yes:

[Numbstruck]

This is sum funny $hit.....

[ShagginJet]

--GUYS--

You guys ever get a stiffy from wierd things? I get them when driving sometimes, usually I'm a passenger and kind of tired, also get them at work sometimes, just be sitting here and I'll get one crawling down my leg.

When I was in high school, I use to get them all the time when riding on the bus, so hard trying to hide a wood on the bus. I'd usually fall asleep on the way in and wake at school with a wood, that soooooooooo sucked.

[Numbstruck]

lol @ the bus

yea car rides do me in sometimes

[Kyle]

you ever noticed that if you fall asleep with wood...you wake up with it...it's odd...:o

[ShagginJet]

I can't fall a sleep with a wood, don't know why. I guess because i sleep on my side and stomach that, hard to sleep on such a lump. g/f helps in that situation... bummer i dont have one at the moment.

[ohiochica]

dammmmmmmmmmmmmm i need a bf!

[GirlRacer]

me too!

[SKUNK-GSR]

Its kinda like the tooth fairy deal....there's this little pamela anderson w/wings that sprinkles soliva( :pukey) dust on our......"WOOD".....before we wake up..

[cjblade54]

Originally posted by Kyle
you ever noticed that if you fall asleep with wood...you wake up with it...it's odd...:o

Yeah.. it makes you wonder if you had it hard all night long or something!!??:paranoid: :confused:

[BlackWolf]

I don't know why you guys are complaining......you don't hear me complaining, do you?? WOOD = GOOD. :yes:

[pbateson]

What is wood all about?

[cjblade54]

Originally posted by BlackWolf
I don't know why you guys are complaining......you don't hear me complaining, do you?? WOOD = GOOD. :yes:

It can be embarassing sometimes.... especially when you are in public. You have to try to hide it... walk funny, put your hands in the pockets just to cover your woody. It is good if you have it when you are at home and you got a girlfriend who likes to get down with it anytime. ;) :bandit:

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by pbateson
What is wood all about?

How to explain this... Umm, Morning Wood is when you wake up in the morning with a "Hard On", "Stiffy", "Boner", etc... We were originally talking about what causes it, now we're just talking dirty.

[ShagginJet]

CJblade pretty much is on the right path, wood = awesome when not in public.

[cjblade54]

Does anyone feel a little pain or soreness after hours of hardness?? I do sometimes... especially when I had a hard on "over night":confused:

[ShagginJet]

I don't keep hard ons for that long, either use them or make them go away. I'm well trained.

[cjblade54]

Well, I am single... so I am having a hard time to "release" my "extra energy." ;)
So, I just work out everyday to keep my energy "down~" :pfft:

[ShagginJet]

I work out too, just with one hand... ;(

[ShagginJet]

Alright guys, time to switch focus. I was just talking to a friend about ballz. There were some things she didn't know so i wanted to confirm that I'm not a wierdo....

So does one ball hang lower on all guys, or do i have a short chain on one of them?

[ohiochica]

lol...yes usually the left testicle hangs lower i do believe. so what didnt this girl know? what should we girls know that we dont know. (wow did that make any sense at all?)

[ShagginJet]

Originally posted by ohiochica
(wow did that make any sense at all?)

Nope....

[ohiochica]

lol it was typed when i was sleeping i think. didnt think it would make sense. oh well nevermind.

[Domslowlude]

Well, To let us know that it still works. If its not up before I am then me I would worry........ Dominic:yes:

[Rob]

I know I came in on this a little late but for some reason my "little friend" always wakes up in the morning before I do.........

[Shot 2 Hel]

Originally posted by cjblade54
Does anyone feel a little pain or soreness after hours of hardness?? I do sometimes... especially when I had a hard on "over night":confused:


we call that blue balls and it hurts like shit